If You're Struggling with LOW SELF-ESTEEM

If You're Struggling with LOW SELF-ESTEEM 

I just said this week to somebody that some of your low self-esteem and your lack of confidence is actually an ego issue that you have and the person stared back at me like how in the world is someone with no competition or low confidence or low self-esteem struggling from an ego issue.

Ego is demonstrated in two ways:

I am the best in the world and I think I am better than everyone.

                                             OR

I am the worst in the world, I am the worst than everyone.

You are much worse than everyone or you say my life is the best and the greatest my life is the worst. My life is far worse than anyone else so the ego likes to push you to the extreme. It does not like to give you balance and honesty and reality it likes to want to make you feel like you have got the worst life in the world and no one else understands it. No one gets there only you get in you get the worst or you're the best and no one else gets you you're untouchable and people miss that they are like how does that make sense exactly like you said but it does make sense because the ego wants to be the top or the bottom but the top of the bottom yes he does not just want to be at the bottom of the bottom, it's going to be the bottom but the top of the bottom right. So we get lost in that and we do not think of it as ego and that's why the only antidote to either ego is self-honesty is being honest and honesty is I am good at these things, I am great at these things and I stuck at these things. That's honestly and we could all sit down with a list of our skills and map out; what we were great at what we were average at and what we knew we were terrible at. Yes, and that's honesty that keeps you so away from either ego do you think part of it too is that when you are suffering from my life is the worst that you are focusing on yourself and you are centering on you and there is an ego connection to that too and that this pathway about getting into the service of other people removes you from which begins to remove the ego. I mean that's a huge point you just made right there like you just dropped some serious like there's like you know please don't underestimate that point everyone's listening like the challenge with all self-centeredness is that all you then indulge yourself in your pain well. You just indulge, you just submerge and like immerse yourself in pain because it's all about you and you know I think someone said it best is that, “You find yourself when you lose yourself in the service of others” and what I love about that statement is that what he means by that is and empaths get this mixed up sometimes. So I want to clarify because a lot of people who are empaths, who are reading, I am always trying to help people but then I get screwed over so here's the answer you're not helping people so that they can thank you. You are not helping people so that they can be grateful to you. You are helping people because you know it's the right thing to do but more importantly, you're helping people because you get to understand and experiment and experience different parts of yourself. When I helped kids growing up that did not have food and was giving them free food I learned so much about myself when I was able to go and give talks that help people or now I write articles. You learn more about yourself when you help people you don't learn anything about yourself when you're just sitting there filling out a quiz going who am I, what am I, like you don't figure but you learn about yourself when you help people and this is what we don't realize. I can't remember who said it recently it was someone saying, “You know the scale at which you succeed is the depth of the problem you solve” and so even if you look at someone who's extremely successful, he's successful because he solved a problem that many people have. Bill gates are successful because he solved the problem so even if you look at monetary success even if you look at financial success comes from service. Any success comes from service, a musician is famous because they are serving, they are serving you by understanding your feelings, and making music. You now feel comforted so you follow them they have served you wow. So don't think of services just charity and giving money which are beautiful things which we all should do but don't just limit your life to thinking I serve on the weekends or I serve once a year. You can serve every moment this article is the same. It is my service because I am serving people by giving them an alternative to just watching some trash show but they're here learning something and learning from the material or stuff that I bring on the screen. I have brought you to that point this is a personal thing because I’m such a believer that you're you move the needle in the world that you can help change consciousness. I am in my little way people say why do you in my small way I would love to think that I am like in that ocean that you see out there like a drop of water and altering the consciousness of the world. Just imagine not me but what I can share with people and my messages and I believe you're one of those people and so I will tell you as I’ve written this meteoric rise of yours I’ve privately a few times not every day but a few times I’ve prayed for you that you would keep this level of humility and so this is an interesting thing. I wanted to ask you but it will serve everybody else there is this balance isn't. There's probably of this there's got to be a little part of you that's like how well did it do and I think that line right there I am not even sure if you or I know the answer entirely but do you struggle with that balance of I am doing this in the service of people. Yet I am sensitive to the response of what I am doing because I think someone reading right now who's going to have a present sales presentation tomorrow wants to be in the service of that person but there's this part of them. That is in that balance we've talked about earlier about what's the response going to be how am I going to be received I want people to like me. I want to how do you navigate that, that's a great huge question man and the answer is let's take that salesperson the more time that person spends in empathy with their customer’s pain and what the customer is looking for the better they're going to be received so that service mindset always helps because if you're thinking about and this is what it comes and I said this to my team when we were writing the book and everything I was working on I said if I sit here right now and all I’m thinking about while I’m writing the book is being a best-selling book then guess what I’m now not writing the book. I am now living in the future and I’m not living in the present and so the only way to make this a best-selling book is to do the process properly I don't think and this is what I do and this is the only thing that's helping me and again I go through all the time after my first blog went viral three-four years ago I stopped creating because of the pressure that I wouldn't be able to live up to it. So I got scared because I was like what if the next article doesn't do as well as everyone's going to think. I am tanking as you get into that self-doubt and that self and I got into that space where I was just thanking you for being honest about it. Am I ever going to beat that right and you get scared I’m not putting anything out I’m just going to stop and then I started to realize I was like well now I’m not living in service anymore. I’m living out of ego and I’m living for feeling a certain way and guess what I’m not feeling better by not putting anything out and actually if I just serve more I’ll learn more so the way have made sense of it and there's a verse, that explains it too is that “you have full control over the preparation the process and the practice but you have no control over the potential result” but all of those three things are the result in and of themselves and so if you get addicted to the process of writing, the practice of connecting with the right people who can help share your work and like you said I am focused on the process of making sure that the most people in the world have the opportunity to read this article but then if they choose not to, it I can't control that but I can control making sure that it's in front of everyone and that I believe in the context and that to me is not attachment that to me is not EGO. That to me is trying to live your best life I mean like you know if you didn't just try if you're like I wrote this book but who cares yes I mean that's not service either because the way I explain it and I’m not claiming that this is it and I’m not trying to say that I think we all feel this way. If you or I see an amazing movie we want to tell everyone about it if you read an amazing blog you want to tell everyone about it if you found the cure to cancer you tell everyone about it for me I got to live an incredible life thanks to these amazing teachers I met I just want to tell everyone about it like that's all I’m doing yes but I want to tell everyone because of how powerful it was that's the best description I’ve ever heard of there's this line I’ve always tried to teach if you want to have outcomes but yet you need to separate from them and that's a difficult thing when people are trying to achieve different things that were perfectly stated being addicted to the process of it but separating from what you can't control. I love it.

Here are three signs you're struggling with a lack of purpose:

•   You feel pressure to know what you want to do with your life.
•   You've lost interest in your own life and feel disconnected.
•   You don't know what your skills are or you feel you lack them.

Hope is not lost you can get through this having purpose and meaning in our lives helps guide us through the ups and downs and creates structure in our day-to-day life. There are many apps for mental health and wellness with thousands of meditations songs to help you relax and focus and sleep stories to help you get a good night's rest and now you can help yourself with what I am sharing, proven tools and techniques to improve your mindset and mental health in a matter of minutes.

 

Thank you